it's buildin' up for you baby

greetings fellow mortals! i have officially hit post 250!

and i also have a lot of homework to do, but since i have written too many chinese words, i will.... do some fun picture posting again. so... class breakfast on friday, where we also celebrated marshy's birthday ( and we were supposed to celebrate jen's too, but she couldn't make it because of the RG investiture D: )

and so we sang the traditional happy birthday song, with nicole playing the piano because... she could. and there were other classes celebrating birthdays too, but ours was better ;D because the cake was homemade :D

yeps, that's the pretty tiramisu cake ying made.
(and looking at it now is making me extremely hungry)

the birthday girl!
(and i'm tempted to call marshy a woman, but there's still a few more years to go before i can)

and since jen missed out on the class celebration, me ying jo and zinc celebrated for her during the sleepover :D oh but there was a rather amusing NG cause on the first try when ying came charging in with the cake, one of the lamps were still on. so she reversed back out and we did it again lol. oh and in the pic, jen's too busy playing geo challenge to bother about the cake :(

but it wasn't long before she was successfully seduced by the sexy mocha cake :D

and since jen traditionally has someone cut the cake with her (for safety reasons), i have hence gotten a rare shot of ying in her glasses :D

and that more or less sums up friday and saturday... and sunday was spent wasting time yeah ;) and happy birthday, you two 16yearold women.

iwishyouwouldstepbackfromthatledgemyfriend

ho ho ho ! i am back to resurrect my blog~! and since i recently synced the photos in my phone to my com... here's some random stuff while i try to remember what i wanted to say :/

lol, random toilet humour

and that's cookie and angel looking like they're out on a date

random shot from the singapore flyer... my phone's camera seems to be in pretty bad shape these days...

and of course, zinc's and jen's beloved investiture 09. they were so neat and organised and in sync that it was scaryyyyyy.

heehee. we were doing some lab duties for smp (feeling filling tips, which basically means wearing tight latex gloves and liberally spraying everything with ethanol then opening up bags of pipette tips and sticking them into containers. rather brainless, which is how we ended up doing such frivolous things)

and now... oh yes. I'M SPENDING WAY TOO MUCH MONEY ON THE GRACES CAMP! my total expenditure as of now is TWO HUNDRED AND EIGHTEEN DOLLARS. which is... way more than i had planned to spend. and i havent even gotten the accessories yet. and i always end up buying things because the salesperson was nice...

anyway, i'm done procrastinating (eeks chinese zuowen) and so... shall find something else to do other than homework. ciao!

IT'S HEREEEEE

finally, the long holiday for chinese new year has arrived. thank heavens. what with all the homework and projects... god, i stayed up to 3am this morning just to do my humanities report

and fyi, it's not finished yet -.-

anyway, i've finally installed the software for my phone, aka the forever-loved zaniel, on silas. heehee, sounds like i mated them or something. how cool would it be, if my laptop and handphone were gay together .

so yes, back to the topic at hand. I HAVE PICTURES NOW!

but i guess won't really post much, except some random shots. and of course, i must not forget to showcase our class's awesome hamper wrapping submission. presenting.....

THE Cow

and not to forget the really pro people behind the work of art... jen, pam, ruio and nicole!

THE Cow won 3rd place (but it should soooo have been 1st) and it's the first time the class has won any school stuff so AWESOMEEEE. thank you for bringing honour and glory to the name of fourthirteen!!!!

heehee ok so i'm being extremely lame and weird but... whattheheck. i had less than 3 hours of sleep today so i'm entitled to it. and here's a little tribute to cookie (monster), who's chomping away on dear mr. nano

heehee, he's so cute... but not as cute as severus :D and with that, i'm gonna return to reading fanfic so ciaoooo~

PS. yes i'm obsessed with severus snape and i can't help it. he's an amazing person who has done amazing things because of his amazing ability to love even after all that has happened to him. i can't believe jkrowling killed him but i dont care because he has been forever immortalised in fanfiction, and will live on forever in the hearts of all his fans.

Lost love is still love, it just takes a different form, that's all.
You can't hold their hand, you can't tousle their hair.
But when those senses weaken another one comes to life...
Memory.
Memory becomes your partner.
You hold it, you dance with it.
Life has to end.
Love doesn't.
-The Five People You Meet In Heaven

depressed...?

can't stand all the homework. all the projects. i think it's stress, or it could be a chemical imbalance. then again, i could just be having a phase.

i feel like going goth.

and for once, eyeliner isn't even scaring me. in fact, i'd like to try it. to do that whole black thing, and see whether it makes anything feel different, with all the chains and buckles and black-white-red combinations. i wanna be a vampire, a proper one, not like that thing called edward cullen. it wouldn't be too hard, seeing as i hardly get much sleep anyway.

It's like a secret wanting.
Like a song I can't stop humming.
Or loving someone you can never have.
-White Oleander

your time is now

happy birthday severus snape

you beautiful, beautiful man

fingers doubly crossed

gah, the first week of school is coming to an end, and i cant believe that time has passed so fast. everything seems to be rushing by, and i can't keep up and i'm just falling behind because i haven't done my holiday assignments. so while everyone tackles the new homework, i'm still trying to finish stuff that i was supposed to have done last month.

i'm back to surviving on 4+hours of sleep a day and spending a total of two hours travelling to school and back. i really miss the holidays but i guess i've got no choice but to try not to drown now that school has started.

so... i don't think i'll write much about the past week cause it's mainly been just lessons and more lessons. the time table has been all messed up and now the subject periods are all weird timings. our classroom is on the third floor now, so it's a lot easier to do last minute printing of homework at the com labs. and i'll definitely be doing a lot of that, seeing as my printer has decided to bail on me.

and today was the selection interview for cca and the sec 1s looked so scared. not much to say, except that i realised how lucky i was that i got to learn so much IT stuff in primary school. so, 2009's officially here and i'll just have to hope for the best. (and look for lots of good fanfic to keep me going)

and now, i shall continue to put off doing my homework. at the rate i'm going, i'm pretty sure i could procrastinate for the olympics. so yes, time to do a little self plugging. i really need people to help me complete surveys for my projects.

if you are a female student
click here

if you are a secondary school student of any gender
click here

thank you to those who have done the surveys.

it's better to die on one's feet
than to live an eternity on one's knees

OMG SCHOOL

shit shit shit shit shit i'm having a fit right now cause i have to wake up in 5hours+ for school AND I'M NOT ASLEEP. (despite ying badgering me to). but not the point. OMG IT'S SCHOOL TMR and i haven't even accepted the fact that it's the holidays.

well, at least now i don't have to.

but WHAT THE SHIT I HAVENT DONE MY HOMEWORK AND PROBABLY WONT. and instead of chionging it out, i'm looking through my sis's yearbook. and it's so unfair k! when my batch graduated from tao nan we didn't get one!

but the pictures are kinda funny, as in they look... warped. like stretched then flattened and stuff like that. still... I WANT ONE. i dont even know what happened to all the class photos they made us pay one dollar for. (it's just ONE piece of film, how could it cost so much? how could they cheat innocent little kids of their money like that!) lols.

anyway, school in 6 hours. so... i'll update when i come back, if my teachers havent killed me for not doing my homework. eeps.

laughter is an orgasm triggered by the intercourse of sense and nonsense.

pet society ;)

heehee. yes i've been wasting time on that game called pet society. and somehow only jo gets why i named my pet doppleganger. and yes i know it's misspelled. and yes i spelt it that way cause the right way looked weird. but anyway, I FINALLY GOT AN EVIL DUCKAYYYY. it's so cuteeeeee. and the teddy's cute too i guess, but not the point. and don't ask about the pink balloons. they were a bad mistake.

so what's the point? i don't know. but there was this random coin rolling around that wouldn't stop rolling and couldnt be picked up or anything. so... lol? i spent awhile watching it roll from one end of the room to another and then back and yes i'm being extremely lame. i'm just hoping my duckay does that too one day.

RAWRRR|| Joey says:
zz
RAWRRRR
RAWWWWWWWWWWR
omg theres so many things in life i wna RAWRR at
GAHHH
GAHH
GAHHHHHH
--kAiliN---> ---- imminent doom alert --- says:
i agree
LIFE SUCKS AT THE MOMENT
AND IT'S GONNA CONTINUE SUCKING
UNTIL EVERYTHING HAS SUCKED
AND THERE'S NOTHING LEFT TO SUCK

i can so totally give lessons on word variations and how to use them :D

no one cares that you're miserable, so you might as well be happy.

holiday greetings

so it's a little late, but i've been busy ok. celebrated christmas yesterday at my uncle's house with my relatives, and we played guiter hero ! somehow, i find it really hard to imagine my uncle dancing in a disco (he claims he did), but i have problems imagining a lot of things really. one of which would be how i was conceived, but let's not go there.

so i would post some pictures which i took with zaniel (my still much-loved handphone), but i'm kinda lazy so tomorrow!

right. so that was wednesday. what happened on tuesday? oh. yeah, that was supposed to be cycling day, but as it usually happens, cycling didn't happen. man plans, god laughs. myron bolitar is the love. tall funny guys aside, basically me, jo and bea spent tuesday morning at ying's house, doing weird shit and playing with ying's hamsters, lunch and dinner, who are really cute btw.

then after that we met jen at marine parade library for lunch and we performed the amazing feat of squeezing five huges plates on one teeny tiny table. and bea drinks coke waayyyyyy too fast. oh, coke can be used to clean blood, you know?
really, go turn yourself into roadkill and test it out .

after that was badminton, which would have been pretty normal, except we ran into nat. and i recall myself gaping a lot... something like cause it really was too coincidental. and i'm still not convinced the guy with her was yihao. he looks... different.

so yep, after an hour plus of badminton we (jen, ying, jo and i only, bea had to go meet her mum D: ) went back to ying's house and had a torture jen session. ying made jen try on her dress and other stuff and heehee. it was fun. and jen, you're too skinny ! but you look nice in dresses, even though you refuse to wear them. but nvm, the bimbo jen project has officially begun!

so after that we lazed about (not doing homework) and randomed about well... random stuff.

ying: queenie's really short.
jen: what's her height?
ying: the same as kai's.
me: *spontaneously bursts into tears*
jo: *snigger*

rather depressing, yeh. and don't ask how we got to that topic. the pure fact that our conversation included guys and measurements is scary. so that was more or less tuesday. and i think i shall end here, cause this post is really getting long.

For every minute you are angry,
you lose sixty seconds of happiness.

dust bunnies abound

i can't stand this anymore. i'm not packing my room! i've been at it since after lunch and until now, i'm far from done! i'm like drowning in all the files and random loose papers and my god.

so i shall leave the mess on the floor, and read fanfic. i found another snarry and hopefully, this one isn't just an extend lemon like the other one. and there's some pretty amazing snarry fanart out there. sadly, no one will ship snarry with me. but what the heck, severusssss

oh and i hope the emoticons are appearing. they're so cuteeee, aren't they? anyway, fanfic time. ciao.

oh. my. money.

right. haven't posted in quite awhile but i've been busy reformatting silas and then helping boost the economy with my totally extravagant spending. so... let's recap. some time ago i went bowling and got thoroughly owned by my family, including my sis. bah, life is sad. i'll post pictures next time if i remember, that is if i've finally figured out how to install my phone's pc suite. and i'm still rather depressed about my really pathetic bowling.

but on the bright side, i've been shoppppping :D so far this month i've spent more than the number of days there are in a year. which is really quite a record for me, but maybe i'm having a phase or something. or it could be the bimbo project taking effect, except that i haven't really been buying girly things. like in the past week, i've acquired four pairs of sneakers. that sums up to about... 120 dollars (not all of which from me, of course :D).

and i've completely forgot what i wanted to write about... oh yeah. I WAS AWAKE FOR 20 HOURS YESTERDAY and i woke up damn cranky cause well, i was woken up. oh and yesterday refers to saturday. i had to wake up real early for an infocomm club meeting, which was supposed to be with the hci icc peeps too, but was cancelled at the time the meeting should have started. urgh piss off. so went to kap with zitian, joey and choon ting, where we promptly hoarded a table without buying anything (except for joey's hashbrown). i really don't like mcdonald's breakfast stuff. though pancakes are an exception, since i havent had them in so long i cant remember how they taste.

all in all, saturday was a really long day and i'm too lazy to write about it. i can't seem to think about anything except THOSE AWESOME CONVERSE SNEAKERS (L). i'm really glad my dad bought those two pairs for me for christmas.

heehee. i'm in love with my shoes. i dont think i even want to wear them. i just wanna stare at them. and maybe... name them? :D

oh S H I T

sigh. i can run, but i can't hide. curse you homework! i suppose i'll get cracking tmr, like with my ih survey D: the whole ih project is wholely whorely screwed up. like argh. we want to be aware of how aware they are that they aren't aware? wth -.- but actually, the ih meeting today was kinda ok, as project meetings go. oh and claire's mum is so cute ! like totally sassy. and she's good with the com, which is more than i can say for most moms i know. and it's scary how many dialects she knows. ah, respect yo. oh and she's really funny, especially when she's joking about claire's lil brother and asking nicole to bring him home with her. i wonder what it's like to have a brother o.O

i think if my parents' had a third kid, it'd probably be a boy. seeing as my ring fingers are longer than my index, it means i was exposed to quite a fair bit of testosterone in the womb. and the doctors plus my parents thought my sis would be a boy... which means... getting closer yeah. too bad it's a little too late, seeing as my sis is 12 o.O

oh and yes you'll be seeing pictures soon, once i figure out how to install the pc suite on silas. like hello, it's a mini cd. and hello, silas has a slot load drive. if i stick that tiny disk in, it's just gonna fall in and lose itself in silas' insides. urgh. anywway, if you couldn't understand the geek talk, just get this. silas doesn't have the right holes.

so tata for now.

alcohol inhibits the male libido.

new phone... finally

so, after two years of using my long-past-retirement nokia 6280, i've finally gotten a new phone. it's the LG renoir KC910, and the functions and all are kinda cool. but all the happiness was kinda killed when the screen protector decided to give me a real hard time. ah you piss off. so after eons are fighting a losing battle, it's still misaligned and has lots of dog fur stuck to it. urgh. 5 dogs = a lot of fur. i just hope i don't kill the touch screen any time soon.

and for some reason, i've been sneezing like shit today. at the rate i'm going, i should have had my first orgasm ever by now, if the myth about each sneeze being 1/8 of an orgasm is true. then again, i'm only 15 and i'd rather have my first one somewhere exotic... like the moon. and so, abstinence is key, and i shall wait until humans have set up a habitable environment on that giant lump of space cheese.

gah. i think the fact that my cold's back has screwed up my head. but that reminds me. apparently someone signed up for this site called sggirls.com which is basically... a virtual red light district. like come on, their slogan is oriental and beautiful and the homepage is splattered with pictures of girls. i suppose they'd rather you come but urgh. and for some reason i find it extremely amusing that the forum is full of guys looking for girls and talk of wands and wanking. so, to whoever signed up as ignitionedge using my email, thanks for the few minutes of entertainment.

oh, and now that i have a phone with an 8 megapixel camera, you just might start seeing pictures on this blog. but till then, i shall leave you with your disturbed thoughts and go finish my stupid panadol cold extra.

Perspective on life according to George Constanza
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends.
I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death. What's that, a bonus?
I think the life cycle is all backwards.
You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy retirement. You drink alcohol, you party, and you get ready for High School. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last 9 months floating...then you finish off as an orgasm! Amen.

money money personality

hahas. ignore the spastic title. i'm feeling vaguely drunk for some reason, though i swear i haven't touched a drop of alcohol.

anyway, let's do this in chronological order. yesterday, i spent another $70 on clothes D: that would make ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY in just two days. my god. but actually, seeing as it's clothes, that's not too bad. i mean, normally a pair of shorts would be at least $20 yeah? but with that 70, i managed to buy one pair of pants, two berms, two shorts, a small sling bag, a pair of slippers, and one belt. awesome, yeah? and it was a fox warehouse sale, so there weren't any fitting rooms, but the stuff all fit more or less ok, except for a pair of berms that aren't too happy with my thunder thighs. but considering everything, i'm quite happy with it.

and if you're interested, the sale is still on. it's at wing tai building, which is at 105 tampines road. it's damn ulu, have fun getting there ;) the tops are going at $7 each and the bottoms are going at $10 each. the jackets are $13 while the slippers and belts are $3 each. oh but the pants are all kinda large-sized while the shorts are really short so unless you have short legs like me (D:), it'll look damn obscene. actually, i only spent 66, but considering that i took 5 buses and 2 mrt trains, it more or less sums up to 70.

speaking of crazy travelling, yesterday me and jen went from eunos to tampines to ang mo kio to thomson and finally home for dinner. gah. don't ask why. oh but we went to thomson for free starbucks coffee, where we also met pam who was at church. actually i'm not sure what jen and pam went off to do after coffee, but i don't really wanna know. impulsive trips to malaca? man, they scare me.

so that's yesterday. today... i woke up semi early at 10 (hey usually i get up at 2 so that's a miracle already) and lazed about reading fanfiction. initially, i had planned to leave at 2 cause i was supposed to go to TM to buy movie tickets since yk would be rushing over after his cca but... heh heh. i got a bit distracted "diffusing into my chair". anyway, i ended up leaving at around 2.30 and taking the same mrt train as him. we got there... a little late but after the tickets and popcorn, the movie started in a few minutes so i wudnt count that as late. oh and guess what movie we watched.

IT WAS AWESOME ! NO, IT WAS BEYOND AWESOME!
IT WAS BE-AWESOME !

hahas. if you couldnt guess from the quote, it involves an utterly adorable hamster and a totally sardonic cat. ah... animal love (L). righto, this post is getting too long. so i shall end this off with a random statement.

FACEBOOK LIED TO ME.

fine. i'm kidding. actually, not really. i tried out the brain game thingy and it told me i had a male brain but when i went to do a brain sex test on bbc, that one told me my brain was (thankfully) female. that left me doing more other random tests but it's really quite fun. you can try them out here.

it seems guys are less horny during spring
cause of their lower testosterone levels.
but since singapore doesn't have seasons,
does that mean singaporean guys are always horny?

eee impulsive spending

yikes. i spent like $70 today... and it's kinda depressing. then again, whattheheck. i've finally got a new wallet and pencil case, as well as some other random things. oh and it's the starbucks christmas open house tomorrow. which means.... free coffee :D yep, each customer gets one free tall-sized drink. you can find out more here.

so hurray for good coffee! ciao.

Logic cannot convince the heart.

Cambiare Podentes: Invocare

WHEEEEEE. i'm super high now, cause fanfiction was amazing. like the story just ended, and it so happened that itunes was playing thank god i found you by Mariah Carey and it was just so... perfect. like in the story, harry and severus were forced to be together but it ended up so beautifully. *swoons like a fangirl*

man, i love itunes. and the song that's playing now would be really nice to play on guitar hero. lots of guitar stuff and drumming. hahas. it's actually quite a nice song, cold hard bitch by Jet.

oh and since this post is extremelyyyyy random, what do you think of this?
i was kinda bored yesterday so decided to do some doodling. and that's done using paper and pencil, my tablet's too lousy to draw with.

anyway, back to fanfic! or at least the sequel :D

Guitar Hero ! Woots !

i am soooooo not a morning person. anyway, my mum brought me and my sis to cut our hair today. and i just wanted a trim, like a little bit, and the guy said he'd cut 1 inch. but you know what? HE LIED. he just hacked off like what, three bloody inches and now my hair is so bloody short. it still can tie, duh, or i'd have killed someone by now, but it's as short as at the start of the year. i can't believe it. a WHOLE YEAR of letting my hair grow, and it's all gone in a matter of minutes. my goddddd.

right, now that i've climbed out of the spiralling depths of depression, i shall pull an extended analogy from legally blonde. "there is one important thing that everyone should care about... my hair. this hairstylist gave me an awful haircut, but it was my fault. i didn't get involved in the process, i just let it happen. i didn't stop him, i just let him hack away at my hair. so everyone, make a stand, have a voice."

ok i don't think anyone who hasn't watched the movie would understand that, cause i seriously reworded it and messed it up and all. but the point is, speak your mind and be heard. oh and do remember to leave a tag :D



so random crap aside, i played my first game of guitar hero today ! and it was really cool. well i kinda suck, but hey, first-timer, cut me a little slack here. i can't seem to coordinate my fingers for the guitar thing, so me and sis ended up messing with the drums while my dad figured out the guitar. and us being a non-musical family, ah the poor neighbours. sorry dom! :D (though i don't think you would have heard us, seeing as my mum was shushing us nonstop) but who knew a little white box called Wii could be so fun. and for some reason, that almost sounds like a sexual innuedo. heehee.

oh and there was this really nice christmas song playing in some shop, but i have no idea what it was! it was a male singer, and the lyrics had something about christmas (duh) being special and something about children and old folks. gah. let's hope i hear it again somewhere.

imperfect.
chaotic.
that's just how life is,
but we live it anyway.

whoopsie

so, it's another ordinary wasted day. sigh, i need to do something with myself. and ying flew to hong kong today. let's hope she does a lot of shopping and buys some stuff for her friends :D but i think like 3 of my friends are going to hong kong this holiday, and i've never even been there. grrrrr. ah well, shopping in singapore is still ok.

but in the meantime, i've started reading yet another snarry fanfic ;) this one has a depressed harry and mysterious snape and so far, it's ok. though i don't think i should talk about gay fanfic, cause according to jen, it's disturbing :(

oh and the water pipe in the front yard broke today, so water was spurting everywhere and my maid had to turn off the maid water supply. then after she turned it back on, slightly muddy water was coming out of the taps. my maid wanted to just let the water run but it made me kinda guilty to waste water like that. so i took a cup and made several trips back and forth to water the plants. but being the easily distracted person i am, i almost watered the christmas tree :X

whoopsie. but all's fine, except for the fact that i'm still coughing, and i shall go back to reading fanfic. ciao :D

When one door of happiness closes,
another opens.
but often we look so long at the closed door
that we do not see the one
which has just opened for us.

FINALLY, I'M DONE

gods, it took forever to make this skin. like i started in late september , then silas crashed, then i had exams, then i had after exams stuff, then i had that 3weeks shanghai trip and now... finally. and you know what? THE SKIN'S SO DAMN GROSS. gah, i can't stand it that it's black base. but still... i couldn't stand the other skin either so bah! at least this one features relatively hot guys ;)

sigh. i think when my stupid cold recovers, i will make a better one for myself. and speaking of my cold, it sucks! i woke up and had freakin conjunctivitis or something like that and it was so creepy cause my eye was all red o.O gahhh. and now that it's night, my cough decided that it was bored and im going about spasming. bah!

ok, not really in the mood to blog so... kapeesh. oh and i decided to bestow my blog with an auto play song, so... don't get irritated to death too fast ;)

Age is just a measurement
of how long we've existed in the world.
That means you can still be immature
when you're 160 years old.

BLOODY TOOTHACHE !

arghhh. IT HURTS !!! it doesnt hurt. it doesnt hurt. it doesnt hurt. it doesnt hurtttt !!!

hell, its hard to lie to yourself when you cant even say it outloud (cause if you do, you end up honking your nose into a tissue or coughing your tonsils out). sigh, life is unfair.

but anyway, bodily trauma aside, i've found an amazing treasure trove with a shit load of amazing snarrys. yay for good fanfiction ! :D and of course, i spent my entire day (or what was left of it after i woke up so late) reading this brilliiiiaaantttt snarry. it was really good, especially since someone did fanart for it and the fanart was drop dead perfect. so adios skinningggg, and helloooooo fanfiction. oh yeah ;)

but of course, since this skin is getting under my skin (ignore the poor pun in crutches), i'm gonna have to change it. somehow. actually, i have this simple plan skin lined up, but it just doesnt feel right. the image so far... is passable, but the css is driving me nuts cause i just can't get it right. urghhh. the codes look downright ugly. sigh, im having nooblet depression.

ah well, i'll finish it up, sooner or later, and i'm gonna retire from skinning. maybe i should take up another hobby... like sleeping :D (and maybe i'll grow taller !)

oh and i'm not gonna talk about shanghai, unless anyone is actually interested. cause if i'll bore myself to death retelling the whole thing, i'll probably bore whoever actually reads my rants to infinity and beyond (does that retarded buzz light year thing).

urgh. toothache. you're outstaying my hospitality. away with you! begone! vamoose! disappear! vanish! (O2, lol) -.-

oh yeah. why on silas' extremely dirty keyboard earth does the disk space on my c drive flunctuate like mad? it's been going up and down and i spent a hell lot of time fiddling with the command prompt and system restore stuff. well, ok so the difference is not a lot, and if it were a wave the amplitude would be kinda small, but when you only have a two digit amount of free space (in megabytes), 300MB is a lot of difference. gah, silas you're having mood swings.

and now that my stupid frizzing hair is almost dry, i can end this infernal trabble and go to sleep. hmms, i really should bathe earlier.

(eeps, last year in nanyang next year :X)

expecting the world to treat you fairly
because you are a good person
is like expecting the bull not to attack you
because you are a vegetarian.

HOME SWEET HOME !

yay! i'm BACCCCKKKK :D and mygosh, it's so HOT WARM. but at least it's not cold, so yeah. anyway, i'm feeling a little lazy to post so... i'll rant about the trip tomorrow. and you have no idea how HAPPY i am to finally see silas again. like after 21 days...

OH I MISSED YOU SO MUCH SILAS !

and i've got new chairs, heh heh. i think my parents figured that what with my record of breaking chairs, they should get more than one. so now, i have this big reddish one and a less... obnoxious black one.

oh and now that the air isn't trying to freeze my tonsils out, i'm hoping my sore throat and flu will go away fast. and i need to soak my feet. i have this vague feeling that they stink, but what with my blocked nose, i can't actually smell them to check. ackk, i need to stop ranting and go bathe.

so, ta ta for now.

stupid, i know
but some part of me still hoped you'd come back
if only just to welcome me home
for one last time

THREE WEEKS IN SHANGHAI !

eeeee. in like around 4 hours time i'll have to wake up to go the airport. which reallyyyyy sucks. but omgosh, SHANGHAI! and i'm not bringing silas. ah, it tears my heart apart just to think of it.

three weeks without silas! what would i do?! and no silas probably means no or minimal fanfiction. which is really bad as well. and my bright orange luggage can't seem to close properly. i'm damn scared it'll burst. but i'm even more scared of getting robbed or mugged or what you call it.

hehs, i suppose that's why the school arranged that self-defence session for us. but it was only one hour, which was hardly helpful at all. we basically learnt how to push people, which i suppose is kinda useful, if that person going after you is like a locomotor idiot. oh and if he's not carrying some giant butcher knife or something.

but back to shanghai. THREE WEEKS! three bloody weeks to freeze my fat butt off. gah, i'll miss my dogs... and prince too, impossible to believe as it is. and cause my luggage is so full, i cant bring pig, sheep nor dog.

and to make things worse, i have this stupid sore throat thats burns real bad. bah! and according to some site, i'll have to wait 5 to 7 days for it to recover. if it doesn't, that means i'm in deep deep deep shit. on the good side, people can't laugh at my utterly horrible chinese cause i can't even talk. yeah ;)

heh. me and zinc are gonna drink lotsa tea while we're at china. i hope that helps my stupid sore throat. but there's gonna be so little shopping, which just makes me really... depressed. and i'm gonna wrap myself up like a giant dumpling in dunno how many layers of clothes, which makes me even more depressed.

gah. guess it's time to sleep. will probably post again... in three weeks time.

( ahhh i can't bear to end this post cause that means i'll have to part with silas D: )

nothing is forever. forever is a lie.
all we have is what's between hello and goodbye.

PICK UP LITTER, YO

sigh. i've got a sore throat. again. i'm just hoping i don't lose my voice (again!) because shanghai is in... 2 days. and oh shit, i haven't finished packing. i'm barely halfway through :(

anyway, we went to pick up litter at east coast park today. which was ok, though it was kinda gross. but the main point is, singaporeans should smoke less. there were a hell lot of cigarette buds all over the place. (and bea found condoms :O) so after lots of hard work ;) , we had a break and pigged out a little before playing random games. like concentration, which we also played during lunch with ms chee :D

then after that went back to class and lazed about while watching youtube videos. oh and i collected my spare pair spectacles today. they feel... weird. like kinda small. zzz, big head -.-

and that's all for now, cause i'm gonna try to so some packing. oh and salad making tomorrow. that, i can probably eat even though i have a sore throat. (unlike the cookies ying is planning to teach me to bake at her house).

"what do you want to be when you grow up?"
"happy."

more fangirling !

hehs. i guess i've gotten bitten by the kpop bug. but anyway, they are kinda hot, aren't they? i'm not sure what's their proper name, cause they apparently have a few, but what the heck, i'll stick to dbsk. or maybe tvxq. bah, all that lost in translation stuff.

i actually saw that mv on tv and i was like, "omg, they're good." though it would be nice to understand what i was listening to but hey, only an idiot would say no to eye candy like that ;)

Ohhh, if there’s one thing I hang onto,
It gets me through the night.
I aint gonna do what I don’t want to,
Im gonna live my life.
Shining like a diamond, rolling with the dice,
Standing on the ledge, show the wind how to fly.
When the world gets in my face,
I say, Have A Nice Day.

-bon jovi

The Panther

His vision, from the constantly passing bars,
has grown so weary that it cannot hold
anything else. It seems to him there are
a thousand bars; and behind the bars, no world.

As he paces in cramped circles, over and over,
the movement of his powerful soft strides
is like a ritual dance around a center
in which a mighty will stands paralyzed.

Only at times, the curtain of the pupils
lifts, quietly--. An image enters in,
rushes down through the tensed, arrested muscles,
plunges into the heart and is gone.

Rainer Maria Rilke

B I G B A D W O R L D

it's a big bad world
we're doing what we can
sometimes we fall on our face
before we even learn to stand
but we get back up
shake off all the dust
and take it step by step

i can fill the whole floor to the ceiling
with all the dead wrong choices ive made
and even though we try to learn
from each others mistakes

we'll do it again (doing it again)
we'll do it again my friend (doing it again)
we'll do it again and again
till we eventually can change
the way its always been

it's a big bad dream
following your heart
sometimes the one you
need's the one that tears you apart
so you say goodbye
kiss her one more time
and cry the whole way home

i can fill up the driest river
with all the tears falling off of my face
and even though we try to learn
from each others mistakes

we'll do it again
we'll do it again my friend
we'll do it again and again
till we eventually can change
the way its always been

just running 'round in circles
tripping over every hurdle
we're just trying to do the best that we can

it's a big bad life
all that we can do
is try to make it right
tomorrow something new
so if a big rain cloud
follows you around
dont let it get you down

we'll do it again
we'll do it again my friend
we'll do it again and again
till we eventually can change
the way its always been

we'll do it again
we'll do it again my friend
we'll do it again and again
till we eventually can change
the way its always been

we do it again and again
till we eventually can change
the way it's always been

S H O P P I N G !

whee! i just beat silas at a game of chess :D but anw, before i rant about me and ying's shopping trip today, i shall complain about how my feet are aching like shit.

right, they hurt! oh and the teenage november issue is using SHABBYPRINCESS resources in their articles. like... phooey. and i thought shabby princess stuff can't be used for commercial purposes. blah! hmms, i wonder if cud start charging people for skins like beyondwords. then i would have money to go SHOPPINGGGG again :D

anyway, yes shopping. didn't really spend much today, cause i went shopping on saturday and sunday too. heh heh. so basically ying made me wake up so early (D:) and we had lunch at eunos then went to orchard. then wandered around all those scary high end shops being too poor to afford anything :(

after orchard we went to bugis, where we bought oreo and marshmallows yoghurt (L) after wandering about the building thingy. and there was this very nice hoodie at... i'm not sure if it's bossini or giordano but yeah, nice hoodie! then me and ying ventured into bugis street and well, that place hurts my eyes. it's not the stuff, just that there's too many things. overwhelming, yeah? oh and poor ying, seeing all the shorts that were so much cheaper than the mango one that she bought but hey, at least you know it fits.

but it really is kinda sad, what with so many clothes made for skinny people. and omgosh, all those departmental stores dedicating whole levels to make up. beauty is being commercialised yo!

right, my feet still hurt. and i need to do my ipod design D: i think i've been ranting about that for like... months. but yeah, i sadly still havent gotten to doing it. procrastination 101, and all that shit. i need to finish that simple plan skin i started during the eoy period too. gah, so many things to do i hope my photoshop doesn't die on me.

some pursue happiness,
others create it.

BAH HEADACHE !

arghh. i feel extremely stupid, what with all the self inflicted pain and all. like this stupid annoying quiz is driving me mad and worsening my already horrible headache. oh but no worries, i'm not into self-injury or whattheshit like that.

oh just for your info, self-injury actually includes any form of physical harm done by yourself to your body that is serious enough to damage body tissue. oh and you do this in an attempt to, well, bri certain feelings or change your mood, etc. so no head-banging when you get royally pissed off by idiots ! and my god, never cut. it's a really stupid thing to do, honestly.

personally, i'm not too sure why some people choose to injure themselves. but it apparently makes them feel better. and according to this site, they do it cause it reduces the pain or whatever strong emotion they're feeling to a less overwhelming level. like "they feel this strong uncomfortable emotion, don't know how to handle it, and know that hurting themselves will reduce the emotional discomfort extremely quickly".

oh but if you know someone who cuts or self-injures, don't blame them. cause it's just their form of coping, and it's more or less the same as those who drink themselves drunk (and into oblivion) to escape their problems. and self-injuring is their form of not killing themselves. rather contradictory i guess, but inflicting physical harm on themselves releases all the pent up emotion and reduces their urges towards suicide.

but self-harm is definitely not a good thing. there are other ways of releasing pent-up tensions and if necessary, get professional help or talk to a friend. cause god, cutting or whatever other forms of self-mutilation is just... foolish. and it's definitely not cool.

those who speak about one's miseries usually hurt,
but those who keep silent hurt more.

welcome home silas !

ah, today was a marvelous day ! firstly, EOYS ARE OVER. see that?

EOYS ARE OVER !!!!!

man, i can't believe it. no more exams for what... the rest of the year. ok so that's not very long, but still, better than nothing. anyway, after the math paper, me, jen, ying and pam waited two hours for zinc. (i'm still waiting for my cert of sainthood to arrive) but actually, i didn't really mind cause we went to coro and drank sugared water and then ate in school. then, we went to marina square to....

go BOWLING ! :D

hahas. haven't bowled for so long and i do weird things when i bowl but... yeah. my scores weren't that impressive, but i guess that's ok. like we played two games and i got around 100-120 which is actually quite good for a newb noob like me. oh and then me and pam attempted to moonwalk but that didn't work out, especially since i was in bowling shoes. and the cleaning uncle was staring at me like i was "a few fries short of a happy meal".

oh but ying's iphone went kapeesh on us (read: malfunctioned and wouldn't work) so after some window shopping, me and ying went to wheelock(spelt wrongly?) to see if it could be fixed and basically did a lot of walking and eating.

and then stopped at paya lebar on the way home to look for jeans. and when i got home... i was so freakin happy i started squealing and jumping about.

SILAS WAS BACK!

hehs. i can't believe how much i miss my laptop after what... 48 hours. sigh. I LOVE SILASSSS :D

right. i was actually planning on writing a more interesting post, but since i'm kinda distracted by the need to find a good fanfic, ciao !

PS. big thank yous to all those who have tagged. it makes me feel like i'm contributing to society (as the school puts it) when i know people are using my skins and all :)

PSS @ ???. thanks for the offer, but i'm staying celibate for severus ;)

When you look at a person,
any person, remember that
everyone has a story.
Everyone has gone through something
that has changed them.

THANK GOD ITS FRIDAY

bah. i thought the weekend would never arrive. but it's FRIDAYYYYY~ and even though i just screwed my bio paper today, nothing can ruin a friday :D

and so, i'm sitting here eating my crystallized yoghurt and looking forward to next year's public holidays.

New Year's Day: 1 Jan (thu)
Chinese New Year: 26, 27 Jan (mon, tue)
Good Friday: 10 April (fri)
Labour Day: 1 May (fri)
Vesak Day: 9 May (sat)
National Day: 9 Aug (sun)
Hari Raya Puasa: 20 Sep (sun)
Deepavali: 15 Nov (sun)
Hari Raya Haji: 27 Nov (fri)
Christmas: 25 Dec (fri)

man, you gotta love 2009 :D

Don't wait for the perfect moment.
Make the moment perfect.

E O Y S

AHHHHHH. right. bio tomorrow and i don't know why i'm blogging but i guess that's cause i can't remember anything anymore so WHATS THE POINT OF MUGGING !

*breaks down*

oh and turns out, silas's graphic card failed. so i got my laptop back on... monday i think. then on wednesday it died again. so the lenovo service center person came by and collected silas. and then i got silas back again yesterday. guess what, his RAM died. so now silas is functioning on half his RAM. which is only 1GB, so he's kinda lagging. bah vista.

bah, so my dad went to harvey norman to get a new RAM, and it's next to me on the table now but i have no idea how to put it in. so on the table it stays :D oh and thank god for warranties, or my piggy bank wouldn't have survived sila's midlife crisis. so yes, silas is workingggggg and no money was involved. yay :D

ohhhh. and my dad bought another 4 years warranty for silas. i have no idea whether i should be indignant or not. like hey... i don't abuse my laptop k. but nvm, good healthcare for silas. it'll probably last till silas's dying beep. and as ying so kindly told me, i'll be 19 when the warranty ends. i highly doubt i'd be using silas. i mean, he'll be around, but more as a keepsake than for actual use.

ok.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

BIO EOY TOMORROW OR RATHER TODAY SINCE IT'S PASS 12.

sigh. it's times like these that i wish the school would have like a power outage or something. then school would be cancelled and the exam wouldn't be in 7+ hours time. BAH! the only reason i havent like died now is that i'm completely looking forward to AFTER exams. only 5 papers left!

There are two ways to look at life,
you can complain that roses have thorns
or you can be happy that thorns have roses

daddy long-legs

right-io. if you have no idea what daddy long legs are, they're just spiders with really long legs. well more or less. oh and they vibrate, apparently. which is what the daddy long legs on the corner of my desk is doing right now. it's been going for at least... 20mins. and i think its slowing down... hmms maybe not.

anw, according to wikipedia, the whole thing about daddy long legs being bloody poisonous except that their teeth cant pierce human skin is a bucketful of crap. and since i'm sitting here watching it vibrate, lets hope its true.

S I L A S ! ! !

sigh. i miss silas. and if you dont know who he is, he's the most wonderful person laptop in the world. i bet he's hotter than your laptop ;) anyway, i got the bloody scare of my life when i turned him on on wednesday morning and BAM. the screen suddenly went black when the desktop was loading up (like after signing in). it's like those cartoons thing, where the colour disappears from the corner and then theres this diamond shape of light before complete blackness. then after that, everytime i turned it on all i got was a big fat blank screen (but it was on, silas was doing his little humming thing).

man, i'm bloody attached to my laptop. so i sort of had a weird emotional breakdown and just stared at silas and started crying for no goddamn reason. it's like staring at a friend in coma i tell you, like you know his alive and still breathing, but hell he's just... in a coma. WAAAAAAAA !

so yeah, in the end my mum sent silas to the lenovo service centre thing. i hope silas recovers :X

and now i feel like i'm... cheating on silas in some weird twisted way. like i'm blogging on this other tiny laptop (my pinky can touch the L and my index finger can reach the A without straining at all. it's that small) and i normally blog on silas :(

and i bet you all think i'm mad/crazy/eccentric/insane/etc. but whattheheck. SILAS !

and it feels so weird, but i'm just not comfortable with this other laptop. i don't feel like reading fanfic or skinning cause it just isnt right. bah!

sigh. and i finished reading breaking dawn yesterday. sort of disappointed the volturi didn't choose to fight but anyway, i cant believe the series is over. guess theres always fanfiction... when silas is back.

and exams next week, but i somehow cant bring myself to care again. i feel sort of... drifty. like everything is happening but not really happening at the same time... i think i should sleep more.

but then i just end up missing christy. i miss having her take up all the blanket at night, about how i would wake up with cat hair on my face but not even care; sigh, i miss being able to hug her to sleep.

so wherever you are right now christy, it's been an amazing five years. i'll love you always.

Everyone says that love hurts.
That's simply not true.
Loneliness hurts,
rejection hurts,
losing someone hurts,
but love never hurts.