Monday, January 31, 2011

one foot front of the other

well hello again folks, it's been awhile. school, as usual, was a mad rush of tutorials, assignments, lectures and all that. i don't really know what i want to blog about because too much time has passed too quickly and i can't discern one day from the other. so yes, school is tiring. and seeing the j1's orientation just makes me envious and scared at the same time. because wow, we're really j2s now. it's our last year; gotta make it count.

rarh okay i got distracted by some stuff we were doing in gp today. being a free thinker just leaves too much grey area to cover and i can't decide what i am. do i believe in god? well i guess so. but a specific god? not really, i don't actually know enough about any anyway. so i guess i'm a deist?

ok so back to trying to recall how i just spent the last 10 ten days and... i don't remember. someone should just hit me on the head, multiple times too. actually no i take that back, i think too many people would want to try :O

oh oh oh yes i remember now :D and all the happy feelings have flooded back in and this is an awesome floaty feeling and i'm not making sense. right. so sat (22/1) was SAT day then tuition then paranormal activities 1 + saw 7 at home with good company. basically involved lots of ceiling-staring and other things; pretty amazing 24 hours yes... monday (24/1) home-based learning so nothing big about that. late night walk was (y) hahas.

and then school started again and then everything is just one blur of too much work and too little sleep. oh yes, first h3 pharm chem lecture and tutorial. zzz i'm not sure if i can handle it but we'll see. and then this weekend... went for training on sat then tuition then movie.

and ahhhh i can't get over what happened today. i'm not sure if it's a good or bad thing. it was so... coincidental. and all because of a fortune cookie. ah well, what's happened has happened. i'm rather relieved that it's finally out.

Friday, January 21, 2011

cause everybody's heart don't beat the same

you mean it's only been two weeks?!
god it feels like months already;
so unbelievably and depressingly tired.
"Where did the past six minutes go?
When time is used up, does it go to some kind of place like a junkyard?
Or down a river like the waters beneath Niagara falls?
Does time evaporate and turn into rain and start all over again?"
- All Families Are Psychotic by Douglas Coupland

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

we all live in a yellow submarine

yes i'm feeling nostalgic;
i'm glad we had so much fun when we still could.
it was a good day today, i guess growing up just brings in new kinds of fun ;D

Monday, January 17, 2011

Sunday, January 16, 2011

we accept what we think we deserve;;

"Then, I turned around and walked to my room and closed my door and put my head under my pillow and let the quiet put things where they are supposed to be."
- The perks of being a wallflower

Sunday, January 09, 2011

expecto patronum

should i sleep early today? there's so much to do and study, but it's not going to make much of a difference anyway. i'm too distracted, wasting time, etc. and see, this is why my blog posts are always so shallow, i just type without much thinking and all these random surface thoughts just find their way into the little box on the screen.

anyway, since being a student for the most part of my life has left me defining my calender years as school years, the year doesn't feel like it's started yet so therefore by that same illogical reasoning my new year resolutions are still on time.

1. stay close to the people that matter
2. don't let the bitches and bastards get me down
3. read many many many beautiful books
4. eat more good food and drink lots of starbucks dark choc mocha
5. lose the weight i gained in 2010
6. retire from my position as professional sloth and become an active potato (so that i have some chance of accomplishing number 4)
7. attain muggerhood
8. do well for a levels

:/ i wonder if they're in order of importance; honestly, i'm not sure.

Saturday, January 08, 2011

rainbows for your eyes to see

so i guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons.
and maybe we'll never know most of them.
but even if we don't have the power to choose where we come from,
we can still choose wherever we go from there. we can still do things.
and we can try to feel okay about them.
- the perks of being a wallflower
i'm feeling very... empty.

there's a hole in the ceiling downstairs

so damn happy;;

Thursday, January 06, 2011

there's a song that you can find in every moment of your life

how weird. i opened and closed the blogger tab so many times. i just stared at the little blank box and wondered what i should write because there are so many small little things i feel like mentioning.

like how i finally bought a very simple bag after a very long and complicated consideration and even though the more practical side of me is aghast at my choice, the rest of me is quite satisfied with it. it's like... a rectangle with straps. like honestly, i don't think bags can get any simpler and i just like how deconstructed it is. but boy am i going to suffer for it when i have to carry more things/dig around to find stuff. oh wells, it would have been too easy to just buy a different coloured clone of my old 'yellow' bag.

oh and finally saw the best friend again after so long. kinda cool actually, since i saw jen on tues, zinc on wed, and ying today :D anyway we wandered around for a long time doing some general window shopping plus bag scouting on my part. lunch at 'swensons' where we underestimated the amount of food we ordered but mmmm it was good. then more dittering at the 'zinc' shop and as ying said, we were doing the exact same thing this time last year. hahas, thanks for tolerating all my indecisiveness and nonsensical ks-ism.

okay so i have more rubbish to add but ive been tasked to go fool around in photoshop again so that's all. and that reminds me, i want to change my blogskin again! need something simpler. this year is a time for simplifying everything, life's too complicated as it is. oh and i changed my wallet to a much plainer one, no more conical studs but it's lime green with hot pink insides. awesome yeah. oh and ahhh i want to make a tumbler cover for myself. gosh i have nothing inside the slot now and i feel weird when i drink from it cause ppl can see the water moving down and it just feels very awkward. i don't know why but it makes me feel very embarrassed hahahaha. oh wells, since bio review test is on friday (hooray!) i have time to go come up with a black and white one. gah, my mum refuses to buy ink because she says it's expensive :(

oh and random but i like the new starbucks logo!

ok off to be a little geeky again, tata :D

Wednesday, January 05, 2011

the fine line between genders

wheeee we finished our ultimate banner for open house today, it's amazing how fast it was done. then again, it was mostly spamming of black paint and it looks so pretty even though the people all have weird oversized calves. and teehee, in the end we actually did have a girl sky the guy, how awesome :D

oh and eeps, the holidays are ending super duper soon and dammit that really sucks. i don't think i can go back to whole repetitive process of school and my time table is all foreign. plus a possible h3 too and project odd which we must reallllyyyyyy start soon. that one will take up a lot of time sigh. the school year hasn't even started and i already have so much work backlogged. damnnnnn.

okay anyway this is a random post because i'm avoiding having to decide between staying up to do work and sleeping then waking up early instead. but this is strangely my more productive period of time in the day and i'm just procrastinating again D:

oh and okay, random trivia: Triskaidekaphobia is the fear of the number 13 :O and looky, there's a "kai" in it! lol ok sorry i'm procrastinating and i do strange things like this. and the "kai" just means "and" in greek according to wikipedia awwww.

ahh peas in a pod hahahahahahahahahahaha. ok that was even more random. but oh damn the peas may start mutating nooooooo~ and lol probably only yingsiu would understand what i'm going on about.

and holyshit my sis had "the kite runner" all along and i could have just read that for the book review instead of struggling through "brave new world" and since i'm only at page 70 after a week, it hasn't been a particularly successful struggle. time to give up on a losing battle and chiong kite runner!

and this is a really really really random post. tada~! lol ok i'm weirdly high, especially since i got scolded/nagged at for coming home late but i think my mum just doesn't have the kind of anger stamina to be pissed at me so after two short rants on the phone she just ran out of steam. i guess it's just the way it is with things like this. like... she wants me home not too late, i end up late, she scolds me, i actually don't try to start an argument (unlike a certain other person), she thinks i'm suitably chastised, we move on. works out fine for us both since i don't start avoiding her calls and she doesn't start demanding i get home before the sun sets everyday.

and ok after all this random rambling i have decided... to do a little work T.T

Sunday, January 02, 2011

with your words like knives; and swords and weapons that you use against me

today was generally a good day, though sometimes i think i'll be a lot happier if i just slept earlier. and it's not the sleep that will help, just the not staying awake.

anyway general recap, dinner with thirteeners at beautyworld on 30th and lunch with them again at plaza sing on the 1st were good. it's nice to be with people who already know you, the comfort of familiar ground i guess.

the last day of the year was kinda nice, though it ended on a semi-sour mood since we started arguing on the way home. didn't have a countdown but neighbours did and... oh forget it i can't bring myself to write about it here because it feels too... exposed and i'm the kind who'd rather add salt to my wounds in private. so moving on...

today was nice, had bbq for dinner and finally got to have some alone time to laze around and i felt a lot better until... awhile ago. i miss my metaphorical rock a lot. i think i just don't like having responsibilities. school hasn't even started and it already feels as if there's always something someone needs me to do that i haven't and god i don't even want to think about my work.

ok no more random rambling. tata.

"It’s easy to be miserable. Being happy is tougher — and cooler."
-Thom Yorke

Saturday, January 01, 2011

these are our glory days

happy new year everyone!
and i don't know about you, but i'm going to try my best to make this new year a happy one; time won't stop just cause you're sad so don't waste your days of being young and reckless, they don't last forever.